The Crew

Sunday, May 3, 2009

Fighting for my virginity!

So I was @ this drag show<span class= with some of my Judy's (Judy's = gay friends). Yes yes I have gay friends! And love love love them to death! Anywho. So i have to break down how the club is. To the right you have your drag show. Left hip hop dance and top level you can look down on it all and get the best bloody long island you have ever had! The BEST! I have to say this one more time fore the cheap seats in the back! THE FUCKING BEST! (Yes they are that great!) Back to the story. Anywho. Anyway I know some club separate the whole men women thing. But not here. The gays party together. Black white young old they go and get their party on. So being a straight women in this type environment yes you do run the risk of being tried. We were in their deep. I had my gay friend male and my gay friend girl. The rest of us straight. Me and my homegirl was in there (both straight) So our friend girl said she would block any attempts on us. I said cool but I wasn't worried about it because I would fight for my virginity!!!
{Now being straight going to this type of club, you can't get mad if someone hits on you. Because hell you don't have no business in there in the first place. But.... Just like in any club you do have those people who just don't know how to take no for an answer! People please learn that No means no! That's going out to straight gay purple!}
So we walking... Having a good time... I mean I have noticed in a club you see a bunch of folk grinding and just being over all nasty! But when you party with the children! Man O Man.... All I can say is "Do you want to see the routine?" This one kat broke down the single ladies dance better then Beyonka could ever dream of even trying to do. Fuck it! That motherfunker right there made the dance up! PERIOD! She stole it from him! I've never in my life seen someone get it on the floor like him! NEVER! I should have been taping it but i was so stuck in amazement! He needs to be doing some one's video's coordinating someones tour something. Can't nahnutter motherfunker dance like that man right there. All I'm saying I didn't dance for the rest of the night after seeing that. Just watching him let me know that I can't dance. I do the same two step with a little twist if that. LOL. I know not what dance is! LOL Man let me tell you how i got myself in trouble! My song came on! Beyonka Get me bodied (I told u I'm not a Beyonka hater... She just do some extra shit sometimes! Moving on) I forgot where I was when the song came on. Because I was getting bodied. You know I was doing the routine... "pat your weave" (I don't have 1 but i was patting) "Do ya old school dance" I was going to get it so I thought. Then the part came on about "Wine it back" This cat got behind me And we were going back and down back and down. But I'm a old chick. I don't get as low as I did when I was a young tender in my youth! He was still going back and down I was just going down. I damn near bust my ass! I had to untangle myself from that carrying on! So me and the crew were walking in a line. My friend girl had went off to handle her two chick situation she had popping off. (She is a mac if I have ever seen one lol! She got game had side chick number 2 and 3 @ the club! O talk about funny!) So we walking in the this like line going from one room to another. When I feel a arm go around my shoulder and I see a chick coming toward me with "I'm about to make you my victim face" on. So here it is! My chance to fight for my virginity. I mean I'm in a almost head lock. But what do I do? What dose slow ass EJ do? Fall back and scream "SAVE MY VIRGINITY!!!!! I'm a victim I'm a victim" My homegirl looks back and laugh her ass off. I'm in shock! I was feeling like i did when that crazy looking lady with no teeth & stringy hair Photobucket tried to kid nap me from the K-Mart when I was 8! I had the same look on my face on and everything. I was ashamed of myself for not even pinching the bitch. I just fell out! But luckily it was just my friend girl. Who blocked some unwanted attention for me. But I was so disappointed in myself! LOL I didn't even pinch the bitch! I know I could never do any real jail time! Hell not the way I hit the deck. Just passed the hell out! LOL. I was so up set with myself. But I did have a ball! I even got to see foolishness pop off! Now normally you go to the other club to avoid the drama and fighting type deal. But on this night. I don't know what happen but this chick took a bottle to the face! I mean she looked like she came up out of a scary movie. The front of the club has these big glass windows! So when she popped up in the window it was like DAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAMN Blood EVERYWHErE! She got fucked up for real. But was banging on that window with all that bloody streaming down her face like she was in that move Cabin Fever! Crazy night out all together!

Drag Show from Empress Journee on Vimeo.

But test the link. Its some great foolishness!


L.M.S said...

I have a bunch of gay friends [i got 2 an all girls school] and boy oh boy do gays know how to party .. This was a funny ass post .

KayJay said...

We in the club doin' the same 'ol 2 step....

Wow. What an experience!
You passin' oyut? Priceless....

Empress said...

I passed out and don't forget screamed! "Save my virginity!" LOUDLY! LOL Trust my friends are STILL clowning me HARD!

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